10 Financial Questions to Ask Before Marriage
Effective communication is key to making a marriage work — and that includes being able to have tough conversations. For many couples, financial discussions can rank high in the “uncomfortable” department.
Still, having money talks before marriage is one of the best ways to build a strong financial foundation as a couple. It can help normalize these conversations for the future while also building trust and helping you develop shared goals.
Key takeaways
- 💬 Talking openly about money builds trust and strengthens your relationship.
- 🎯 Aligning on financial goals helps you plan your future as a team.
- 💡 Discussing budgeting, bill responsibilities, and emergency planning can prevent future stress.
- 📊 Understanding each other’s financial background leads to smarter, shared decisions.
1. What’s your current debt situation?
Even if you keep finances separate, debt can still affect shared dreams — like buying a home or starting a family. Being open about what you owe and your repayment plans helps you both find the best path forward.
And if one of you carries significant debt, keeping some accounts separate could help protect at least one credit score, making it easier to qualify for things like apartment rentals.
2. What are our financial goals?
Want to buy a home or start a family? Or maybe you dream of traveling the world or buying investment property. Talking about what you both want — and how you’ll pay for it — ensures you’re on the same page.
Even if you’re not ready to make a large purchase now, knowing it’s a goal in the next few years can guide smart choices today, like saving more, keeping expenses low, or building your credit together.
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3. Should we share finances?
There’s no single “right” answer — what matters most is open communication. Some couples keep finances separate and split bills, others use a mix of separate and joint accounts, and some combine everything.
Because everyone is different, it’s important to choose the system that works best for your needs. Talk through the pros and cons of each approach.
Remember: You can always adjust as your life together changes.
4. Are we protected if the worst happens?
Life is full of unexpected occurrences, especially when you have a family. Whether it’s a natural disaster, medical bills, or suddenly losing your job, it’s important to be prepared financially for whatever life brings your way.
That’s where an emergency fund comes in. An emergency fund will tide you over for a few months until you get back on your feet financially. While it’s not a permanent solution, an emergency fund offers financial security when the worst happens.
5. How did your family handle finances?
Ever heard the saying, “history repeats itself?” It’s true with money, too. How your parents handled debt, bills, and paychecks often shapes how you approach them.
Talking with your partner about financial stress in your families can help you both see where you might want to do things differently. It’s also a great place to start your financial conversations.
6. What’s our financial strategy?
Some couples create a shared budget, often using an app or spreadsheet, while others just check in weekly or monthly to review expenses and plan ahead.
The key is having a system that you both agree on, so that money remains a regular part of your conversations.
7. What’s our plan in case we get into financial trouble?
No matter how responsible and disciplined you are, financial troubles can impact anyone. It’s important to have a plan in case financial troubles affect your family.
That could mean building an emergency fund or a sizeable savings account, or it could be agreeing to cut back on expenses. Whatever the case, having any type of plan is better than nothing.
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8. Are you saving for retirement?
Even though it might be decades down the road, it’s never too early to start saving for retirement. Ask your partner if they feel that saving for retirement is important and what their plans are in that regard.
If 401(k)s and Roth IRAs aren’t an option, consider other investment opportunities like real estate. As long as you’re on the same page, you can create an effective retirement game plan.
9. How do you feel about investing?
Along with retirement, it’s never too early to start investing. If you’re lucky, your future partner may already have accumulated an impressive investment portfolio that’s paying dividends.
On the other hand, maybe neither of you thinks that investing your finances is important. If that’s the case, decide what you want to put your money towards and strive for that goal together.
10. Who’s going to pay the bills?
Whether you have a budget or not, it’s important to decide who’s going to manage bill payments once you're married. This includes everything from your utilities and Wi-Fi to student loans, rent, and department store credit.
You should also agree on what an acceptable amount is for these monthly expenses to avoid overspending. This is where having a budget comes in handy, because you know exactly how much you can afford to spend each month.
Money talks are hard, but they get easier!
There’s no doubt that financial discussions are among the toughest you can have with a future spouse. The key is to start these talks early and often and normalize the conversation as much as possible.
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Notice: Information provided in this article is for informational purposes only. Consult your attorney or financial advisor about your financial circumstances.
About the author
Jalin Coblentz has contributed to Advance America since 2023. His experiences as a parent, full-time traveler, and skilled tradesman give him fresh insight into every personal finance topic he explores.
